You wanna touch this shit? Derek The worst thing I've ever heard. Dr. Robert Doback: [they start getting hot and heavy] My name is Robert, and I play racquetball. Dr. Robert Doback: [they make out on the bed] I have a boat, and I wanna retire and sail around the world… Dale: You have the voice of an angel.
: No, it's not about money. Dale Doback: I work at a college as a janitor even though I feel like I’m smarter than most of the people who go there. You guys, I really like your guys' setup up here... Dale Doback Denise: Obviously… you don’t know me. | In a heartbeat, Robby. I love talking to you from across the room. Derek Dale Doback: On Planet Bullshit!
[makes eating noise].
Brennan Huff: Two things: You keep your liver-spotted hands off my beautiful mother. It's the fucking Catalina Wine Mixer.
We could hug. And I can sing hiiiiiiiigh! :
Derek Brennan Huff: Yeah. Derek: It was in international waters, so they couldn’t prosecute him. : This is twelve hundred dollars a week for voice lessons, and this is what I get? Nancy Huff: Brennan, you’re 39 years old.
Dale Doback: Dad, why are you talking to me like this?
Derek: What if I were to tell you that I could sell this house… for 30 percent above market? I lather this up with Kiehls in the shower. It’s like masturbating in a time machine. FAILURES! Brennan Huff: I was watching Cops. I used ninja focus to slow my heart rate down. You and your homeboys can play on that. Brennan Huff Whoa, calm down, man.
: Learn more about working with Thought Catalog. Step Brothers Quotes. Brennan Huff: You’ve actually seen him eating a man’s penis?
[shrugs] [sarcastically]
Nancy Huff: You don't know anyone named Johnny Hopkins. Brennan Huff: Yes.
: What's with that, dipshit? Brennan Huff: Sticks and stones may break my bones, but I will kick you repeatedly in the balls, Gardocki!
I haven't had a carb since 2004. Derek : : Brennan has a man-gina!
I made over 550K last year. Brennan Huff: I’m so scared right now. You want to touch this shit? Nah, it's how I talk. : Brennan Huff: You’re not a doctor… you’re a big, fat, curly-headed fuck! Alice: This’ll just take a minute. :
Derek: You can have some dope parties on this lawn. See these? What do we do now? Randy: [makes eating noise] : Like Kobayashi.
: : Brennan Huff: I love you so much. This is what I live with, every day.
Those are my two bugaboos. In a heartbeat, Robby.
Dale Doback: Why are you so sweaty? Dale Doback: Yeah, I got ’em from the 70’s, 80’s and 90’s. Denise: That is so… off-putting. Brennan Huff: In the galaxy of This Sucks Camel Dicks!
Derek If you lick my butt hole. Let's go! Dale Doback Dale Doback: Suppose Nancy sees me coming out of the shower and decides to come on to me. Nancy Huff: … and I love the movies of Rob Reiner! Nancy Huff: Oh, little league?
STANDS4 LLC, 2020. I don't know! : :
I haven’t had a carb since 2004. That means a few things – we like to shit with the door open, we talk about pussy, we go on riverboat gambling trips, and we make our own beef jerky. IT IS ABSOLUTELY ONE-HUNDRED AND FIFTY PERCENT YOUR FAULT! [as Derek leaves] [pause] This is what I live with, every day. My penis is tingling right now. Derek: I am the VP of the biggest executive helicopter leasing company on the western seaboard.
Mom and Dad aren’t here. You’re failures! Actually, I have the opposite of a problem: I made over 550 K last year! We're doing our best to make sure our content is useful, accurate and safe.If by any chance you spot an inappropriate comment while navigating through our website please use this form to let us know, and we'll take care of it shortly. Hey Derek, you know what's good for shoulder pain?
: Oh God, you're impressive.
: As soon as she’s of age, I’m putting her in a home.
You want to touch this shit? Derek
What's up man? Submit your writing to be published on Thought Catalog. : Dale Doback
(He and Brennan do a high-five).
Then I’m gonna try to get a job at Enterprise Rent-A-Car, because they got an excellent corporate structure and they… *they* give *you* the tools to be your own boss.
There’s really little you can do about it. You destroyed my boat, you beat me up in your sleep, and... worst of all, you made Nancy and I resent each other! And I would like to raise my glass; Dale and I wanna welcome you to our home with open arms! We truly appreciate your support.
Awesome Scene Derrick Gets Into A Verbal Bashing Of Wits & Gets Punched Out Of The Tree House.
:
Brennan Huff: Is that what she said?
Derek Denise: So, I thought we’d begin talking about your parents’ divorce. Dr. Robert Doback: [at his wedding ceremony] I would like to thank all of you… for being here with us on this fantastic, wonderful day!
: Yeah. Brennan Huff Brennan Huff: I’m just thinking about our life together.
I’m your son. Let me just hop on.
And you… You mess with my nut, Brennan, Randy here is gonna eat your dick.
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